Change doesn’t happen by accident. And the changes showing up in my life are exactly what I’ve been asking for. I call it Conscious Manifesting. It requires creating, naming my desire, then surrendering.
It’s putting out to the Universe my big plan, then letting go of any attachment I might have to the outcome. This doesn’t mean I then sit back and do nothing. It means I allow the Universe to show me which way to go, become aware of the synchronicity that comes my way and pay attention to repetitive thoughts, etc. I’ve done this many times in my life and when I let go of the how it all happens, the outcome is way better than I can ever imagine.
So why, when opportunity is knocking at my door do I hesitate to invite it in? I’ll tell you why! I’m afraid of playing it big. Stepping into my greatness seems extremely close and it’s a freaky thing for me.
I love my life as it is yet I desire more. How do the thoughts of conscious manifestation and hesitation wander through my head at the same time?
Here’s how the dialog runs through my mind: Trust the journey. But there are so many unknowns. Quit future tripping. But you have no control over the future. You well know the only thing you have control over is this moment. But even then, do you really have control?!
I’m coaching myself through my mind games. I know these dialogs all too well yet the thought of stepping into my great big life is terrifying! Why are we so afraid of our greatness?! After all being the best version of ourselves it why we came here. What is it about our greatness that makes us want to stay safe; play it small; be unseen?
I’ve been like a turtle on the track…slow and steady wins the race. Not that I’m in a race mind you. I’ve just been on the slow path of production. I’ve wanted to write a book about our journey through Central and South America and tried to start it last year. But the Universe took me on a different path. I trusted the detour and it’s served me well.
Over the course of the last month I’ve been contacted by an editor of a publishing company. I reached out to many moons ago. She was persistent, thank goodness, yet I kept forgetting to get back to her. The Universe was actively giving me signs it was time to pick up my book again and continue writing. This was the part of manifesting that I just told you about…when you’re suppose to follow the signs.
Last week I called her back. We chatted for almost an hour and I’ve decided it’s time to write again. I have unlimited access to her greatness. I hired a writing coach to guide me through the process of writing. I no longer feel alone in this process. It doesn’t feel overwhelming. It’s incredibly exciting and I can feel the rush of it all permeating my energy.
But a small piece of me still wants to just hang out.
It’s my ego. It wants me to stay small, play it safe, remain hidden. It’s a real battle going on in my head.
I know why I want to play small. Because writing a book about our travels lets you into our world. It opens me up to vulnerability and judgement. You’ll find out our family isn’t perfect, or anywhere near it.
But actually, that’s the point of the book. To let you know nothing is ever what it seems. No one is perfect. Life is messy. And if you just follow the guidance you’ll be lead to greatest dreams.
I’m surrendering to the Universe once again. Not that I don’t do this on a regular basis already. But I’m really surrendering big this time. I’m jumping in with both feet and asking for guidance. I’m surrendering my fears and no longer willing to play it small. I’m writing my heart out in the hopes that somewhere in our story you find inspiration for yourself. Somewhere you’ll find you also have a story to share.
I’d love to hear your feedback! Do you find area’s of your life where you’re playing small? What do you do to avoid being big in this world? Are you serving your life purpose? It’s cathartic to get it out. We’d all love to cheer you on. Let’s play big together!
Check out this weeks video where I chat more about this topic.